New TV!!!

The day after NFL’s championship games
Came the search for the VICTORY TV
The success of Randy and the Patriots
Provoking a formidable buying spree
--
My personal shopper first researching online
The choices we did weigh and measure
I was educated with awe and wonderment
In the pursuit of an entertainment treasure
--
Then to the selected stores we went
Now with anticipation ready to buy
The sight of all the glorious screens
Palpable joy enough to make one cry
--
After comparing prices with those at Sam’s
At Best Buy it was spotted with glee
A sign with the Pat’s Flying Elvis logo
An unquestionable decree
--
And this shall be your sign
It was like an angel from heaven
Saying buy your TV right here and now
A great deal to you will be given
--
And then turning to the right
The perfect TV was found
A glorious 40 inch Sony
My personal shopper it did astound
--
Then the sales girl was persuaded
A hard bargain I did drive
As with the TV I demanded the Patriot sign
What a deal I did contrive

(I believe her exact words were with much animosity in her tone, “You can have every Patriots sign in this store”. She was clearly not a fan of winners.)
--
Then my shopper asked a question
Asking for this nonfan’s advice
Why an exact same 40 inch Sony TV
Had a more expensive price
--
She told us my less expensive one
Was priced based on a fallacy
And so my personal shopper
Had found a deal for me, indeed
--
And now for the Super Bowl XLII
I’ll be watching on the perfect screen
Randy and the Patriots annihilation
Of that other much crappier team

The Award for the Slowest Delivery Goes To...

When hungry on a Saturday night
Stacy with the urge was stricken
To order Chinese from the Great Wall
An egg roll and sesame chicken
--
After an hour the food had not made it
And she was getting famished
She called to check on the driver
It seemed that he had vanished
--
The fabulous Great Wall worker said
They would call and check
After another 30 minutes with no food
We were thinking, “What the heck???”
--
And then my repeated prediction came true
Much to Stacy’s delight
That a certain someone would call her
Before the food would arrive that night
--
Stacy called again to find the driver still on his way
The hours now totaling two
I could have ran a half marathon
The miles I could have accrued
--
Then Stacy asked the fabulous worker
If she could get a discount for the wait
The worker said only the manager could authorize that
And he happened to be in China far, far away
--
The driver finally arrived at the OC
And Sandy ran out with great speed
The driver said “AWWWW, KITTY!!!”
Stacy worried Sandy could be future Chinese
--
And so our advice is to pick up
If you order from them at all
As the award for slowest delivery
Goes to Morgantown’s Great Wall

Jess Leaves Us A Warning

Our New Year’s resolution to tan has resulted in quite the improvement in our appearances and is a strong part of covert operation Get Noticed At A Conference. However, as Jess came to visit she defaced our lotion with a skull and crossbones. She believes the dangers of tanning outweigh its benifits. Pish Posh, as an old friend of mine used to say. Tanning is endorsed by pediatricians. Or at least I know a pediatrician who goes tanning...

Congratulations Aunt Carol

Officially a licensed practicing nurse
After hours of studying she had immersed
Aunt Carol past her boards
This event we must record
Her strong skills can now be dispersed

---

The above picture demonstrates Carol's ability to save lives even before she was officially licensed. Here, she brings forgotten snacks to our cousin Christmas get together.

Rock Band!!!!!

After waiting for what seemed like forever
Scott and Kayla finally met my demands
We were invited to the Tundra
To try out the famous Rock Band
--
I was quite the natural on the drums
Pretty much commensurate with Scott in my skills
He patiently provided me the sage words of advice
To tap and not to kill
--
Mom and Brenda with minimal assistance
Gave valiant attempts of which not to be ashamed
For Trisha’s response to the critics
“Guys, it’s just a game.”
--
Juxt opposing his ability to elude guitar playing with me
Brian Bailey’s presence to us was granted
The night’s master at the microphone
An invitation to him would never be recanted
--
Kayla sang Enter Sandman with passion
Jess demonstrated guitar adeptness to only aspire
Stacy “enthusiastically” tried microphone as well
And Andy also gave a guitar performance to inspire
--
And now an XBOX 360 and the game Rock Band
On my apartment I would like to bestow
Though I anticipate my new financial advisor
Will give that a definite no

Trip To Charleston

We began our trip to Charleston

On the way shopping our inclination

Though stops at many Dicks and Targets

Ended only in frustration

--

An alarming display at Kohls

Resulted in Allison's decree

Regarding Michigan sweatshirts amongst WVa's

What the crap, are they free?

--

A Charleston must experience

IntaJuice was not eluded

A Banana Berry Burst smoothie

In my day was included

--

We arrived at the Civic Center

With Allison coveting Oklahoma's coach

While she would rather have Capel

I maintain support for the Huggins approach

--

With 2 overimes; free basketball

Allison and I's often solo cheering did impart

Suspense we almost couldn't take

That ended with broken hearts

--

Then from the ashes of disaster

Solace could only be taken

In the Patriots victory over the Giants

And the records Tom and Randy were breaking

--

We left the joint of Charleston

Wishing the Mountaineers would have won

(as someone said) "Our logo should be a broken heart"

But hey, our trip was fun