My Football Team Is Good! HUH!

Despite my enthusiasm for other sports, my enjoyment of football has been fairly weak in the past. One year, I came pretty close to football enjoyment when I participated in my friend’s pickem contest for WVU. I happened to win the contest by choosing the same score each time and by being one of the only people to choose the opposing team as a winner due to a low loyalty factor that a lack of care provides. I still have not obtained my desired reward for this, a certificate declaring me football guru. This year, I have been talked into participating in a fantasy football league. I had to come up with some gimmick in order to get me interested. I really wanted to identify with my guys so that I could cheer them on. I tried looking up NFL players with interests similar to mine. This proved to be difficult. I could not come up with a single guitar player among them. I realized I needed a paradigm shift and switched to finding guys with some sort of criminal behavior. Whether it be drug use, domestic disputes, or DUI’s, these were the guys for me. My picks will have tempestous pasts and be interesting to watch. Our draft is this weekend and I am actually excited for a football activity. Here are some of my picks, along with their previous offenses. You couldn’t find a nicer bunch of guys...at least no one will accuse them of being boring.

Chris Henry, problematic since his days at WVU where he exhibited unsportsmanlike conduct. In December 2005, he was pulled over for speeding and marijuana was found in his shoes. He was driving a without valid license and without insurance. In January 2006, Chris was arrested for multiple gun charges. He is also being investigated in connection with a sex crime. In June 2006, he was arrested on DUI charge.

Reuben Droughns, harassment and assault charges. He is accused of throwing his wife to the ground and onto a bed before throwing her outside and locking the door. He was also acquitted of charges of drunken driving.

Sebastian Janikowski, bar fight in 1998, breaking curfew in 1999, arrested at a night club in 2000 at which time he tried to bribe the arresting officer. Just 8 days after he was acquitted from this charge, he was arrested on suspicion of possession of the designer drug GHB. In January 2002, he was charged with DUI and less than a year later, he was arrested after a fight.

Larry Johnson, assault incident in 2003 where he was accused of slapping a woman and threatening her with a gun, domestic abuse assault September 2005.

Jamal Lewis, charged with shoplifting from a Macy's department store in high school. In 2001, he was suspended four games for violating the NFL's substance abuse policy and was charged with attempting to distribute cocaine in 2004.

Terrell Owens, while playing for the 49ers, feuds with teammates and coach, controversial statements, suspended for conduct detrimental to team

Randy Moss, took part in a racially-charged fight at his high school that left one person hospitalized in 1995, tested positive for smoking marijuana in 1996, suspicion of assault with a deadly weapon and marijuana possession in 2002, fined 10,000 dollars for unsportsmanlike behavior after mooning fans in 2004.